Flower Essences are my biggest support for working through big things. They are incredibly powerful. They are especially powerful in working with trauma pieces. The process goes something like....
1. we recognize that we would like change in ourselves
2. we identify the type of trauma that may be connected to that change (it doesn't and nor will it usually be in specific details as that's kind of how traumas work, especially those that imprinted on us at a very young age. Some trauma experts suggest that all trauma is preverbal, therefore we simply wouldn't have the words or possibly even the memories - but we will likely have a feel when we look to the patterns in our lives and see the commonalities.)
3. we choose a flower essence to work with that resonates with the type of trauma (These are Lillies. We may also choose other essences to support this)
4. we begin using that essence (or essences)
5. opportunities are presented to us that have a similar flavor or vibration as the original trauma and we get the chance to experience them from a new perspective and make new choices (the opportunities are usually a toned down version of the original trauma)
6. then one of two things happens..........we either make a new choice - something different than we did prior and we HOLD that choice and stand solid there (This can be very very hard to do). OR we make the same choice we did before (this tucks it away and says "not now"......and I promise you it will surface again and again to see if we are yet ready.
It is all an incredibly fascinating process how we get the opportunities to work along side the energetics of flowers to support us to work through the things we want to work through. Ask and you shall receive. And essences are not the gentle things you think they are. They hold up the mirror starkly in front of your face and say "This is what you said you wanted. Choose." It is also interesting to note, as I said in step 6 above....that once we become aware of something that we want to change, it will continue to return. Just because it felt too big in that moment, doesn't mean that we no longer want to address it. It simply means not now. And that's ok.
I recently had a very interesting experience working with one essence in particular that I would like to share here. I always feel that teaching through storytelling is a wonderful way to demonstrate and teach. It serves as an example of one possibility, rather than stating "this is how it will go." Because it's different for each of us and there is no right or wrong way.
Back in the late summer or early fall (Im not always great with remembering timelines......this happens to those that tend to be in more than one at the same time......ahhhhh the blessing and the curse of temporal perception!)...I took a workshop series taught by David Dalton at Delta Gardens. This series was on the heart, but for me ultimately was about worthiness. It was the hardest work with essences I have ever done, The year prior I had done a very intense workshop on Lillies, which are the essences that we use to work with trauma. Both of those experiences came into play for me big time the past few months.
During the heart workshop, there was a guided process which involved writing something on a piece of paper (I think something we wanted to let go of) and tossing it into a fire (all done through visual meditation). I was surprised that as soon as I had tossed mine into the fire, I grabbed it back out. I felt like I was being dishonoring, cruel, and a bad person.......and that my job was to hold onto that piece, as it was the "right" thing to do. I either spoke about this then or after, and the feedback I got really brought forward some things into my awareness that I didn't even recognize as trauma (we usually dont recognize these deep imprints, especially when they are so ingrained that they are almost part of our make up - almost.......because in reality they really aren't, but being present so long, we believe them to be. What it brought forward was the conditioning that the tone of the Catholic religion that was present through all of my childhood had imprinted. Quite simply, I believed that suffering was worthy. Suffering made you a good person. Holding things that made you uncomfortable to make others comfortable was the right thing to do....and it was how you got into Heaven. All sorts of memories came forward - remembering when I asked for any sort of clarification (I always asked.....why aren't the dinosaurs mentioned in the Bible.......because we know they were here and if the Bible started at the beginning of planet Earth, you would think they would be mentioned.) I was told "We don't ask those things.".........(ok so I shut up). I was also told that God can reward you or punish you. The reward always seemed to be getting into Heaven and the punishment was anything and everything bad that happened to me, from bumping my head on a doorknob to falling down while playing hopscotch. I remembered my grandmother lighting candles to Saint Dymphana for me- the saint who took care of the mentally ill - yeah cute, right?!) and there were a lot more.
OOMPH! This is a sort of trauma by group betrayal.
I reached for Amethyst Temple Lily - which is an essence from Delta Gardens specific to group trauma and betrayal that has occurred in the name of the divine.
Seemed fitting. Seemed like....ok this is going to stir up a few bad dreams while things surface and then they will all wash away because I know better now and just need to clear this.
It would be really lovely if that's how it worked. AND....it's not. Flower Essence work is energy work, and energy work follows patterns that were referred to as "Lesson, Test, and Bill". Essentially when we want to change something, the lesson flows in, in which we get the opportunity to make a new choice. IF we make that choice, we then get Tested.....this usually comes with presenting us with a very hard challenge to see if we really want make that choice.....can we stand in the discomfort......IF we "pass the test" by making a new choice.......we are BILLED. That Bill usually looks like.....here are the results of your new choice....can you stand in it? Can you stay with your new choice and also accept what resulted?
I forgot about all of that, as I sometimes do......which seems really silly....but even I who's been doing this work for a very long time, just wishes it would be a little bit easier sometimes.
I started using Amethyst Temple Lily Essence and the first night had nightmares. This often happens when I use essences for big work. I like to take them at night, because processing through my dreams is easier for me. I get more information. I work through things more easily without my mind (im very strong in. mental body) coming in to hamper any process with it's never ending stream of "What ifs".
I used it daily for about two weeks. Sometimes by itself, sometimes with other essences to support.
Then I paused on it. It hadn't really brought more forward, so I thought, "Well I guess Im done with that. Easier than I thought."
Careful of your words. Words are wishes and prayers and spells.
Meanwhile, I was dealing with something in my life. Something I had sat with for months that was making me more and more uncomfortable. (Remember that third chakra area I mentioned in the Markers video? It kept growing and tugging until it was so big I could no longer ignore it.).
I crossed my t's and dotted my I 's .......which meant that I waited for confirmation that my growing discomfort was valid. I didn't need to. The fact that I was uncomfortable was enough. AND.........that need to validate runs deep and is a piece I am definitely working on. When I felt I had gained confirmation, I addressed the issue in a direct, neutral, empowered way. (here an expectation of mine (that I didn't see at the time) that fell short. when we come from an empowered place, we can make the mistake of expecting others to be able to receive that. If they are not coming from an empowered place (most people are not), they will not be able to receive it. ).
Without going into detail here, because details really don't matter, I found that I had greatly upset someone, so much so that I found myself pushed away from a group I was. never even a part of. (which in itself is a bit funny and brings to mind that old saying "I would never want to belong to any group that would have me as a member." or something like that.). This was probably the balm to ease the blow. AND really this was the way the universe (and myself) was bringing me this trauma piece to work through in a way that was a bit more palatable and a bit less overwhelming.
This doesn't mean it was easy.
I then got to stand in my choice with the results of that choice, which was incredibly uncomfortable. I found myself wondering if I should placate, should I go in and try and fix the discomfort I had created to make other people more comfortable? This is what I normally would have done. And This seemed absurd to me at this moment in my life. (I am not responsible for others discomfort. We all have choice.)
And then it all came flowing in with this incredibly clarity.
What was happening was the same vibration of the whole group/religious trauma piece I had been working through. (GOSH DANG DARN IT Amethyst Temple Lily! You are a fucking powerhouse!)
I had revealed something that, if even entertained, would shake beliefs - so it wasn't even entertained.. It was the same thing as with the dinosaur question. Had my grandmother been willing to entertain that question, and ponder on it for a bit, she might also say "Hey, why AREN"T the dinosaurs mentioned in the Bible?!"......and that would create holes in the reality and the story that she had chosen to believe - and would likely create a bit of an earthquake that reverberated through her groups. If she questioned something that others in her group did not question, it might make others also expand to ponder things....which they may do.......they may also get very angry at the person going "hey, look at this hole over here!", when it was something they would rather not acknowledge. So silence it and go light a candle to a Saint, because if you make it go away, it didn't happen. (and blame the person asking the question by lighting a candle to the saint that takes care of crazy people asking for her to help to right her ways - which is really saying.....help. us shut her up because she's going to throw a monkey wrench into our story and no body wants that! ITs Uncomfortable!. Yeah religion sure did a number on me....and I think many of us)
I found this whole revelation incredibly fascinating. I had asked to work through something and invoked the help of a flower essence....and it really had brought me that lesson in an incredibly potent way with incredible clarity. I believe that while it made it more intense, it also helped to soften things so that I did not find myself in a situation of reinforcing that trauma - then again that could have been me. Often we fail to give ourselves credit for doing the hard work. It wasn't just the essence. It was also me. It was a sort of connected teamwork.
When you invoke the assistance of these beings, they will give you exactly what you asked for......and you do not get to decide how it is going to flow in. You only get to take the opportunities presented by beings that aren't as weighed down by all of our human mental bullshit, which is probably to say they are wiser beings than we, and make new choices.
Flower Essences are not gentle. They are potent. They are powerful. And they will always steer you towards a place of greater wellness and well being. Always.
Wow! I had no idea. Thank you, Jen and blessed be